Funny moments!

Discussion in 'General Off-Topic' started by Nickorator, Feb 24, 2014.

  1. Bubbleawsome

    Bubbleawsome
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    *sigh* well, might as well say it. I got a 1-inch scar on my lip from a toilet. Slipped and fell.

    EDIT: lol, 1,666 post.
     
  2. TechnicolorDalek

    TechnicolorDalek
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    I have a 1cm indentation on my face. Not a scar, but a small indented line of skin. Apparently either a toy fell on my face or another kid hit me.
     
  3. argilla11

    argilla11
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    After a fairly mediocre session, I accidentally stepped on my girlfriend's bloody period pad when getting out of the bed and tracked blood on the carpet all the way to the bathroom. About a minute later she did the same thing.
     
  4. moosedks

    moosedks
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    ...you screwed her while she was on her period?

    dude what
     
  5. argilla11

    argilla11
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    What? What's wrong with period sex?
     
  6. Hati

    Hati
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    Around that time of the month my roommate and her uterus seem to emulate each others personalities. Uterus wastes my friend's hard earned bodily resources constructing an environment befitting of a developing infant and then every month trashes everything and wanting to start over. In much the same way my roommate may break something and then break more things because she's angry that she broke something. In the same way that the uterus wishes to start over, I'm forced to start over with the vacuum cleaner. Why would you risk aggravating an organ and host that would insist on making your home just like them?

    Jokes aside ... Oh god... all through the carpet and aaaaa
     
    #86 Hati, Feb 27, 2014
    Last edited: Feb 27, 2014
  7. Potato

    Potato
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    Whoah this thread just took a real bad turn.
     
  8. Cardinal799

    Cardinal799
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    Erm, well I would rather talk about all of our funny and painful moments, rather than sex. Mmkay?
     
  9. Potato

    Potato
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    On time I randomly woke up at 3am and thought that I needed to get ready for school, so I took a shower. About half way through I realized what I was doing. It was good getting to sleep showered for a few hours, though.
     
  10. mrniz666

    mrniz666
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    Agreed.

    Again, when I was younger I had a pedal go-kart. Decided to ride it down a hill in the neutral gear,I hit 30 mph and it was fun! ...Until I went over a bump and it kicked into the forwards gear, the pedals pulled me forwards and around the go-kart, I lost a lot of skin.

    Another hill related injury, I was going down a hill on my bike, then for some weird reason the front wheel fell off. I went over the handlebars and rolled down the hill, at the bottom of the hill there was a patch of nettles.
     
  11. Hati

    Hati
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    This has become the horrific injuries and slightly disgusting incidents thread and not the funny moments thread.
     
  12. CBJ023

    CBJ023
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    Just found this story online and thought it was funny, that moment when the top rally driver says he never listens to his co-driver , and also apparently kidnapped a homeless man: http://i.imgur.com/uMpkCAc.jpg
     
  13. SixSixSevenSeven

    SixSixSevenSeven
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    Caution: do not approach british drivers, hazardous for ones own mental health (sometimes physical, although we appear to have a knack for avoiding objects - sometimes :p)
     
  14. JDSJOEL

    JDSJOEL
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    When I was about 6, I threaded all my parents jewelry through the floorboard in our house. They had to wait until we moved house to rip up the floor and get it out :D.
     
  15. Cwazywazy

    Cwazywazy
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    We used to have one of those pedal power go karts with a forward/neutral gear switch. It was pretty fun but it was fairly small and if you turned hard enough you could go on two wheels which is awesome fun. Never fell over from doing that even though I did it endlessly.

    Then when I was 10-11 my grandma brought us a used go kart with a 2HP Briggs that used to be our cousin's. (1 wheel drive, crappy paddle brakes that push on the back wheels.) When we got it the mixture screws on the carb were out of adjustment and the engine would run flat out all the time. The gas pedal did nothing. Before my dad put them back into adjustment it was scary. I crashed into a tree and the engine just kept revving until my dad came and shut it off. After that was fixed, it was pretty fun. It had one of those resistance clutches or whatever which meant you could just hold the brakes and the gas pedal then take off. It didn't have very much power and the engine was pretty worn. It ate spark plugs and eventually the needle in the carb bowl bent and the replacement I ordered was a dud and leaked gas through the air filter. I just stuffed it into the garage until it was thrown out. My mom wasn't a big fan of the kart since we basically turned the backyard into a dirt track with it.

    As some of you may know, I made quite a bit of money last summer mowing lawns on our $300 riding mower. Well, I was mowing our lawn and I was behind the side of the house and I was trying not to hit the well but I wasn't paying attention to where I was going and went straight into the side of our house at almost top speed. Kinda hurt. I bent the steering rack too so the wheels were pointed inwards. I fixed it by taking it out and giving it several whacks with a hammer and sledgehammer. One time I was mowing a neighbor's lawn down the street and the engine started cutting out. It would act like it was starved for fuel at high revs and eventually wouldn't start at all. I had to push it uphill to get it home. Even though someone helped me I felt like I was going to pass out at the end. Turns out the little hole in the fuel cap was blocked and when it used up gas it created a vacuum and no gas got through to the carb.
     
  16. Potato

    Potato
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    Last fall I rammed a tree going pretty fast at my grandparent's house. It didn't mess anything up because that mower has a big-ass push bar on the front. But this is why I hate the hydrostatics with the hand throttle bar thing on the fender. It just takes too long to let the throttle off because you gotta reach over there, and the steering on the thing is so heavy I'll like sprain my wrist if I try to steer it with one hand. So you when something happens, you gotta chose to stop or go all Mario Andretti on the thing and try to dodge whatever is in your way at full speed. You can't do both. You gotta pick one. I also completely wiped out like a whole row of bushes. I guess it would have been really funny to watch because I just went right through them. When I finally was able to stop, I was sitting on top of the remnants of the bushes, so I had to pick the front up and scootch in off of them. I had both of those accidents the same mower. I have never wrecked or wiped out half of the landscaping at my house with either of my mowers, the ford or the cub. They both have the pedal operated hydrostatic.
     
  17. SixSixSevenSeven

    SixSixSevenSeven
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    Lay down straight in a pile of mud today...

    Couldnt open my car bonnet, cable linking the release handle to the mechanism had stretched so the handle wasnt applying any force to release the bonnet. Took it into the farm yard, we have a concrete ramp with a gap down the middle for under vehicle access. Parked my car up on it (later got a bollocking from stepfather over this, apparently I do not have the required skill to park on it?), hopped out, where I hopped out was still on the ramp so I walked to the front of the car, jumped into the gap and immediately lay down under the front end. Looking first was not on the agenda and subsequently caused me to get a bit muddy :p


    Was futile anyway, could get a proper grip on the cable to release the bonnet, needed something with a bit more leverage and everything I had didnt fit the space available to move it in. Turns out, get a fat person to sit on the bonnet, pull the handle in the car to its limits, get the person to stand up again and it opens with them. No idea how that worked, but thats what the garage I took it to did. Cable has been tightened (has adjustment nut thankfully), mechanism cleaned and all lubricated. Alot of effort just to get at a relay which I suspected may have been faulty (actually had just come unseated from its socket), was causing the passenger side indicator to fail intermittently (sometimes worked fine, sometimes didnt, no real pattern to it).

    - - - Updated - - -

    Can't say it sounds too appealing myself but sex is sex right and its not the weirdest thing I have heard of.
     
  18. Car crusher

    Car crusher
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    Tried messing with my scion fr-s I put nitrous on it. Burned the whole stinking engine up. A Friekin dent. Blew the engine to shreds :rolleyes:. I ran out of the car and it caught fire... :mad:! Luckily no injuries. Poor car never drove again... Hah. Well now im carless car-less
     
  19. go14smoke

    go14smoke
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    Four words: stepping on a Lego.
     
  20. TechnicolorDalek

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    Whenever someone is hurt.. I ask them how bad the pain is on a scale of one to stepping on a LEGO.
     
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