Welp, this is what I get for trying to make a joke. Back into my cave, then. - - - Updated - - - Oh god! I hate it when someone texts me "hey, can I talk to you?" NO BAD NEWS! IM STRESSED ENOUGH, THANK YOU!
I was at IKEA and saw someone loading a Volvo 240 station wagon with desks while eating a plate of Swedish meatballs.
Bagel and Edward’s Expedition of Justice and Other Things that Won’t Fit in a Title of a Socially Acceptable and/or Reasonable Length (A Work in Progress) One day, in ancient Baglandia (a socialist society of oppression, and fascism- two strangely opposing concepts that meet in an even stranger dictator-lead monarchy), one bagel sought to break the system and be more equal than the rest. This bagel, born to alcoholic, abusive, uninterested and frankly indifferent parents, was named (rather ambitiously) Bagel God. Tired of a life of mediation and over-equality (as is usually the case with most communistic forms of government), he joined up with his longtime acquaintance (formal friendships were strictly prohibited in Baglandia) Edward (who, as the result of an unforeseen and unexplained genetic mutation, was born as a chili sauce packet from Panda Express- though the idea of a being that did not conform to the ideas of their social code scared the government, leading them to put Edward in total and complete exile until the age of 27); they aspired to rise up through the societal (and official) rankings until they eventually would attempt to fix the horribly corrupt and oxymoronic “government” put together by the equally ambitiously (or pessimistically) named Evil Bagel Lord and his comrades. (My, I am using a lot of parentheses.) After a long and fateful journey of many unexpected hardships (which I choose not to write purely out of my own indolence), the duo arrived at the gate of the “house of equality”- an immaculately landscaped palace with a moat- and began the undertaking of fixing decades worth of prolonged and sordid negligence. Staring at the moat, Edward and Bagel wondered how they might go about getting across. What could they could possibly do to solve such a conundrum? “What could we possibly do to solve such a conundrum?” spoke Bagel God. “I’m not sure, Bagel- wait, did you hear that strange noise?” spoke Edward. One moment later, nothing happened. Then, another moment later, nothing happened still. Finally, just over three and a quarter moments later, a grinding noise began to sound and it was at this moment that Edward and Bagel realized they were in plain view for anyone who chose to look in their exact direction. “Better hope nobody looks in our exact direction, Edward,” spoke Bagel. It was later proven that his remarks were in vain; for at the base of the lowered platform was a tall, gaudily dressed bagel with a scowl, a staff in hand and the unmistakable odor of sesame-seed cologne wafting from his general vicinity. Time seemed to slow as his condescending form rolled over to question his visitors. “Who doth appear on my cobblestone doorstep? I am the Bagel Lord and my superiority is unquestioned!” the Bagel Lord boomed. Intimidated, Edward and Bagel ran back to their base of operation (a cave that showed evidence of previous inhabitants; relevant only in the sense that it provided food, light, and bedding) to re-evaluate their plan of entrance. Bagel God pulled out a map he drew before his departure of the House of Equality and its surrounding grounds. “If we start here and work our way around, there’s a chance we could enter through the Entrance of Equality, reserved only for servants of the Bagel Lord. If we find a suit one of us might be able to pose as one of his ‘faithful assistants’,” Edward suggested. “Fine idea. I’ll stay around front, and you can locate the mechanism to open the entrance door, whereupon we will infiltrate the grounds and destroy all of his property.” Bagel agreed. The cave they found shelter in was, as previously mentioned, nothing more than a simple cave with some basic necessities for survival. It was a bit out of place, then, that a servants uniform hung on a coathanger chiselled into the roof of the cave (for reasons better left unexplained). “Time to put our cunning plan in motion,” Edward and Bagel God said at the exact same moment (down to the millisecond, in fact- scientists continue to reassess this exact moment in time to figure out just why such an event occurred- but it can be reasonably assumed that it was either a rift in space time or a subliminal connection). The pair left their cave and headed in the direction of the House of Equality.
This is going to be a long week... At this rate, I'm not going to get any sleep tonight. And yesterday was pretty lousy. I've got two tests and two projects due tomorrow. Wednesday is (thankfully) an early release day. Thursday I have another test, and Friday, who knows why Friday will bring. My first period teacher is full of more BS than a 10-page essay paper. And what am I doing? Drowning myself in music. Why? Because I feel like shit. Damn it's going to be a long week. And it's barely Tuesday.
Scanias are great for Aussie conditions, Better then the American shit that is always breaking down and guzzling fuel...
It seems everyone at school today is either tired or hung the fuck over from drinking too much Guiness. 3 tests today for fuck's sake. They are cramming the shit in because there is a field trip Wednesday-Friday to Savannah, and about 5/6 of the 8th grade are going. I know for a fact the buses have WiFi, which means I'll be on here the whole time really.
My Sci Vis teacher spouts nonsense for an hour, just to explain a concept that would take any normal person 5 minutes to explain. He refuses to allow use to work while he spews nonsense, leaving us only about 30 minutes to do an hour and a half of work. And, unless we can get hold of copies of 2014 editions of Adobe Photoshop, Illustrator, 3DS Max, and several other expensive programs, we can only do the work in his class.
I think my truck has a little more major of a problem than I thought. Perhaps it's gone too long with a bad thermostat and I think that coolent is starting to get into the cylinders a little it as it can be hard to start sometimes. Or it could be because it's a Chevy, that's a possibility too.
